My best friend, the friend zone and jelousy at it's finest

This has been on my mind non stop since it all unfolded, and I have decided I need to write it down somewhere, and what better place then grasscity? This is quite a long story, but I'll try to keep it as short as possible for you blades.

Here's the quick recap so that nobody has to read a paragraph:

• Friend S has liked H for years now, always had a soft spot and a crush on her
• H dated S's friend and S and H stopped hanging out as much
• H broke up with said friend recently and S wanted another chance
• H friend zoned S in the past and still to this day
• H started hanging out with S again and I was with S 90% of the time so I became friends with H also
• H started texting me and asking me questions about my life through text messages and that made S extremely jealous
• H invited me to drink and go bowling with her, without S
• Plans fell through and we ended up at S's house as we usually do
• After leaving S's house, S asked me not to do anything with H and I gave him my word
• H and I met up because we had never really hung out with each other other then at S's house
• The next day S found out we hung out exclusively and was ready to befriend me
• Talked S down and now he says he wants nothing to do with H and I shouldn't be friends with her anymore because he is still hurt over it

Now here is my input on the situation. H doesn't have to many friends, and she was best friends with S. Well from my understanding, S was only friends with her because he wanted something more. Now who she thought was her best friend doesn't want anything to do with her, solely because the relationship wont turn into more. I never had any intentions of doing anything aside from hanging out and chilling, just as we do at S's house, at my place or hers. We even talked about it and I told her first that I wanted nothing to do with her besides hanging out and being actual friends and she agreed. S thought I was trying to steal his girl, when in reality I was just trying to make another friend for myself.



Does anyone else think S over reacted about the whole situation? I talked him down from slashing my tires or never talking to me again, but he said he will be pissed if I hang out with her again. I think it's kind of selfish that he won't let me just be friends with somebody solely because they wouldn't date him. What do you blades think about this whole situation? Any advice on what I can do to talk S into letting me hang out with her? She's like one of the guys to me, so it would be like her saying the same shit about S to me.

Tell him to fucking grow a pair, He can't be a whiny schoolgirl over one chick that doesn't even like him to begin with. There are plenty of other fish in the sea, He's just being a giant flaming vagina about it. And he threatened to slash your tires? I don't know about you, But when people threaten me, Violent Or non- violent threats. I teach them a BIG lesson, If you catch my drift. What I would do, Is sleep with the chick, Brag about it to the fucking pansy, And then when he threatens you, Knock him the fuck out. He should realize that she doesn't like him and move on, Not be a little fucking kid about it. What are we in grade school? / End Rant.

Tell him to fucking grow a pair, He can't be a whiny schoolgirl over one chick that doesn't even like him to begin with. There are plenty of other fish in the sea, He's just being a giant flaming vagina about it. And he threatened to slash your tires? I don't know about you, But when people threaten me, Violent Or non- violent threats. I teach them a BIG lesson, If you catch my drift. What I would do, Is sleep with the chick, Brag about it to the fucking pansy, And then when he threatens you, Knock him the fuck out. He should realize that she doesn't like him and move on, Not be a little fucking kid about it. What are we in grade school? / End Rant.

I realize that you are looking from the outside in, but put yourself in my shoes. This is my best friend so I realized that the threats where just out of anger and not well thought out. I know he shouldn't be making a big deal out of it, and truly I got him to snap out of his false hope of trying to get with this chick. I feel torn between making a new friend or keeping an old one.

This has been on my mind non stop since it all unfolded, and I have decided I need to write it down somewhere, and what better place then grasscity? This is quite a long story, but I'll try to keep it as short as possible for you blades.

Here's the quick recap so that nobody has to read a paragraph:

• Friend S has liked H for years now, always had a soft spot and a crush on her
• H dated S's friend and S and H stopped hanging out as much
• H broke up with said friend recently and S wanted another chance
• H friend zoned S in the past and still to this day
• H started hanging out with S again and I was with S 90% of the time so I became friends with H also
• H started texting me and asking me questions about my life through text messages and that made S extremely jealous
• H invited me to drink and go bowling with her, without S
• Plans fell through and we ended up at S's house as we usually do
• After leaving S's house, S asked me not to do anything with H and I gave him my word
• H and I met up because we had never really hung out with each other other then at S's house
• The next day S found out we hung out exclusively and was ready to befriend me
• Talked S down and now he says he wants nothing to do with H and I shouldn't be friends with her anymore because he is still hurt over it

Now here is my input on the situation. H doesn't have to many friends, and she was best friends with S. Well from my understanding, S was only friends with her because he wanted something more. Now who she thought was her best friend doesn't want anything to do with her, solely because the relationship wont turn into more. I never had any intentions of doing anything aside from hanging out and chilling, just as we do at S's house, at my place or hers. We even talked about it and I told her first that I wanted nothing to do with her besides hanging out and being actual friends and she agreed. S thought I was trying to steal his girl, when in reality I was just trying to make another friend for myself.



Does anyone else think S over reacted about the whole situation? I talked him down from slashing my tires or never talking to me again, but he said he will be pissed if I hang out with her again. I think it's kind of selfish that he won't let me just be friends with somebody solely because they wouldn't date him. What do you blades think about this whole situation? Any advice on what I can do to talk S into letting me hang out with her? She's like one of the guys to me, so it would be like her saying the same shit about S to me.

:confused:

Tell him to get over himself and be an adult. It's about that simple.

Yea he's over-reacting, but he will not get over it, grow a pair, whatever you wanna call it. He has strong feelings for her, and she hurt him, even though she wasn't trying to. I would sit and think about how good of a friend has this kid been to you.

Long story short, if you think this chick is worth losing a good friend over, go for it. Otherwise, if he is a good friend worth keeping, I'd say, take the loss, there's plenty of girls out there.

I don't understand anything you wrote

:confused:

Was the useless post really needed? Read it

I don't understand anything you wrote

It really isn't hard to follow. Try reading it when you're not baked

Yea he's over-reacting, but he will not get over it, grow a pair, whatever you wanna call it. He has strong feelings for her, and she hurt him, even though she wasn't trying to. I would sit and think about how good of a friend has this kid been to you.

Long story short, if you think this chick is worth losing a good friend over, go for it. Otherwise, if he is a good friend worth keeping, I'd say, take the loss, there's plenty of girls out there.

I haven't known this kid for a long time but for the time he has been my friend, hes been a great one. I'm not sure if you are implying that I am trying to date her, but that is not the case. I just want to be friends with her, as weird as that sounds. It's amazing how learning someones background can make you not attracted to them.

im soo confused. is h the girl and s the guy? and youre a guy????

im way too high for this

[*]After leaving S's house, S asked me not to do anything with H and I gave him my word

[*]H and I met up because we had never really hung out with each other other then at S's house

There is your problem. You gave him your word and you turned back on it.

Another thing is think of it this way, if you are in his shoes the girl you liked for years end up going with your best friend. You know that it is not going to feel good. And since you guys are best pals he would see you often and the chance of him running into H is much higher than if all connections are broken. It is basically adding salt to the wound. Give him some time to heal man.

If u read the story as S = Shawn and H = Heather it is easier to follow.


I got the story OP. S is being a fucking baby man. If the girl doesnt like him he needs to get over it. Its not gonna be easy, but he needs to man the fuck up.

If u promised your buddy that u wouldnt see H then u should stick to your word OR be a man and tell him that u want to pursue her to his face. If he gets mad then personally I would stop hanging out with him.

Was the useless post really needed? Read it


It really isn't hard to follow. Try reading it when you're not baked



I haven't known this kid for a long time but for the time he has been my friend, hes been a great one. I'm not sure if you are implying that I am trying to date her, but that is not the case. I just want to be friends with her, as weird as that sounds. It's amazing how learning someones background can make you not attracted to them.

How about you simply use fucking names instead of " I love Pi= 3.14159265358979323 but Pi= 3.14159265358979323's brother's step-sister, E=mc2 secretly taped Pi= 3.1415926535897932's friend's boyfriend in the shower so now Pi= 3.14159265358979323 parents hate me."

Edited by NeverBSatisfied, 10 March 2012 - 05:17 AM.

How about you simply use fucking names instead of " I love Pi= 3.14159265358979323 but Pi= 3.14159265358979323's brother's step-sister, E=mc2 secretly taped Pi= 3.1415926535897932's friend's boyfriend in the shower so now Pi= 3.14159265358979323 parents hate me."

I'm not going to use name simply because of privacy. I don't know who lerks around on this website and I don't want this coming back onto me.

I'm not going to use name simply because of privacy. I don't know who lerks around on this website and I don't want this coming back onto me.

Ah, the plot thickens.

So yesterday was terrible after about 8 pm. My friend got pulled over and got possesion and a pipe, my friend from the story had his grandpa die and I was up until 4 am thinking about this shit with a 9 hour shift today. He came over and we had a long talk but I really didn't want to be an asshole because he was at his worst. He told me I can't talk to her ever again but I really think that is selfish. Why should she have to suffer not being friends with either of us now just because he cant get over the fact that she has no interest in dating him? I plan on heading to his house after I get off work and telling him how its going to be. I would rather have him hate my fucking guts and have him learn a lesson about it then have him keep torturing himself about it and bring me down with him. Everyday is a lesson.

Ah, high school. Wait, I don't think you ever mentioned high school, maybe it was just all the stuff about H and S, but anyway, sounds like high school.

The way I see it, you have two options:

1. Stick with your friend, he doesn't sound great, but he'll come around in time... he sounds like he's in high school.

2. Ditch your friend to get the girl. It may work out, it may not, but there will be drama, oh god will there be drama.

Personally, I'd go with #1, there's less drama that way. Tell S he needs to chill, tell H that you can't do anything serious with her because S has had a huge crush on her for years. There will be other women.

Ah, high school. Wait, I don't think you ever mentioned high school, maybe it was just all the stuff about H and S, but anyway, sounds like high school.

The way I see it, you have two options:

1. Stick with your friend, he doesn't sound great, but he'll come around in time... he sounds like he's in high school.

2. Ditch your friend to get the girl. It may work out, it may not, but there will be drama, oh god will there be drama.

Personally, I'd go with #1, there's less drama that way. Tell S he needs to chill, tell H that you can't do anything serious with her because S has had a huge crush on her for years. There will be other women.

No everyone is out of high school and H is even a year older then me and my friend. There is already a bunch of drama, so I don't really thing there is anything I can do to avoid. I really don't want to get with this chick, just have her be another "bro" so to speak, but my friend has no idea how I could think like that. Just because he loves the shit out of her, doesn't mean I do too.

No everyone is out of high school and H is even a year older then me and my friend. There is already a bunch of drama, so I don't really thing there is anything I can do to avoid. I really don't want to get with this chick, just have her be another "bro" so to speak, but my friend has no idea how I could think like that. Just because he loves the shit out of her, doesn't mean I do too.

Well then best of luck to you.

Go behind his back and play it like a pimp:cool:

He will find out eventually but fuck it.

Well blades, it's been a few months and I never really see anybody update their threads so I'll go ahead and let you all know what happened out of boredom.
I'll keep it short for interest in time as I have to wake up for work.

Friend told me to either stop talking to her or he wouldn't be my friends anymore. Told him he can't choose who I can and can't be friends with. Figured why should I give a shit about his interests in the girl and proceeded to be friends with benefits for a few weeks before she broke it off. I still talk to her now and again, but we aren't as good as friends as I hoped. Still got my nut and my friend has no clue, as does her ex boyfriend who she is now perusing. No regrets

I want to tell him, just to give him a dose of reality. He's still falling over her, when she has no intentions of being anything more then a friend with him. He still talks shit about me, even though I just laugh at his maturity level when she tells me about it. I got what I wanted out of it, and hes still back at square one, with one less friend. She told me not to tell him, and I probably wont but its a good story to tell.

Oh, and there was drama. Ungodly amounts of drama.