You got about 50% of guys who are probably shy... I'd say 60-75% of girls are shy... The confident guys get a pop at 100% of girls (minus lesbians) and you get 25% IF they want to talk to you, which they might not because you may be too shy. I'll give you my advice, as I'm probably 1 or 2 steps ahead of you in this field. I know what it's like, to not be able to look a girl in the eye for more than a second. I know what it's like, to be stuck there, not being able to say anything because you're too afraid of what will come out of your mouth. You just have to do it. Start on anyone, start as small as you like. Walk down the road and say 'morning' or 'nice day isn't it' to absolutely any stranger. When I started doing it, I noticed how awkward most people are (remember the 50% and 60-75%?). Most poeple won't expect you to say anything to them, that's just our developed culture, keep to yourself and talk on the internet a lot. Talk about a recent event, events are great. If you know someone, hell you don't even have to know them well at all. You just say hi <name>, how's it going? They'll say Not bad or fine (this is normal, just what everyone does). If that's all they say and don't ask you how you are, press them further, don't be afraid of more conversation, that's what you want practise with, right? If they don't say anything, go straight to what they said. "Just fine, not great?" or something like that. I can't really predict anymore stuff that they'll say as humans are so random and that's what makes practising difficult. I think I let conversations go where it's 80% of them talking and 20% of me talking. I just ask random questions of people. "What religion are you?" "What's your philosophy on life?" "Are you superstitious?" Everyone thinks about this stuff, but they hardly talk about it. I'm sure you have answers to all those questions that you hardly ever discuss. What asking questions about ideas does is it makes YOU seem more interesting. You haven't said anything, but because you're discussing an interesting topic that you initiated, you have claim over their interest, they're obviously not going to put it on themselves, even if they're talking. But I digress... My advice: Don't go straight for the girl, get some practise, talk to girls you have little to no interest in, or focus on one girl and talk more to her friends to understand her a bit better. Or... you can keep making threads about how you wish you had the guts to do it. The choice is yours, and it hopefully isn't a hard decision.
I'm a shy guy for the most part. If I consider the girl an 7+ I'll smile at her maybe say hi but usually not much more. And ultimately shell take the next step or it never becomes anything more. And girl under that I'll immediately talk to and show my intentions. Just talk man. Eventually you'll find a girl who you care what you say around her then take the next step.
Love the shy guys, every boyfriend (3) that ive ever had ive hand picked and went after because I knew they never would. If I waited around for someone to approach me... yea *where'd everyone go*
This just makes me shake my head so hard.... Completely subjective and unfounded statement, but I guess it seems to be working for you, so just keep on doing what you're doing.
I know girls want a guy to be aggressive in the relationship but c'mon if one thing goes wrong and you know what I mean we are fucked and it just shatters a mans confidence moving forward.
Omg, just talk to em. Treat em exactly as you would anybody you know, and if you dont know what you shouldnt say to a woman your momma done u wrong. I mean how hard is it really to say hello to someone? I mean you would say good morning to someone who said it to you right? Its just like that. You should always keep eye contact, as a man you need to know eye contact is important always. Same as a firm (but not aggressive hand shake) I dunno how many girls said they get turned on by a correct hand shake. Shy can be cute but gets old quick
Not to sound rude but did you even read the first post? Im not looking for a love guru here. I have no problem talking to girls its 2 completely different things to flirt and talk to women than to initiate romance.
Hm I never saw a difference. I always looked at guys that aren't shy are just shy guys that make themselves go for it. Ive always been shy and embarassed when I do anything, but I force myself to do it. So I guess im saying ive always looked at people that act shy were just ... Lack of a better term - weak. And that a shy person just needs a kick in the ass to be a man. Ive neve bought into, everyones different etc... We are all the same deep down.
I'm with the OP. It sucks that guys are expected to make the first move. I especially hate it when women play hard to get. If you don't show me that you're interested, I'll assume you're not. I need eye contact, a smile -something, anything- before I'll think about moving in. I also hate how a lot of women think being shy is a lack of confidence. That is so unfair and nine times out of ten not the case.
I do this. I work as a cashier and i'll kinda flirt with attractive girls who come to the counter. Girls like to talk, for them its like there favorite thing. Doing this has DEF boosted my confidence with girls as i am prone to being shy. p.s loving the statistics. I have about a 90% success rate.
it depends. some guys are shy but you can tell it's because they're nervous and want to do something. when that happens i think it's kinda cute and i like to make a move. but other guys... if you're shy and you don't do anything we might mistake it for you not being interested, and that's why we didn't make a move. so it depends on what you mean by shy.
So you're a girl right? You say guys should just talk to girls, it's not really hard? Well, if its so easy why dont girls ever seem to start conversations?
I had to reject a girl this weekend(in the nicest way I knew how) and she still ran out of the room crying. My friend was all like and then I was like Made the rest of my night an awkward experience. SMH, ladies need to keep their emotions in check.
Sorry dudes. Man is the hunter. You want to be hunted? Don't complain about her wearing the pants. You lost the upper hand before it even started.