i'm a fucking hero.

[sodomizedjello]

alright, the beloved family dog ran away about three weeks ago. i must admit i was happy about this, though i enjoyed getting her high and feel obligated to care for little creatures, she never quit her yappin and pissed and pooed everywhere.
the rest of the family was devastated, she was very hyper and that got mistaken for lovableness. even neighbors and distant family members were sad that she was probably dead.

then today, miraculously, i see her a few blocks away running down a driveway with a wagging tail to greet her new caretakers. i was reluctant to retrieve her, seeing as how i dislike the smell of urine on my bed and the feel of poo in between my toes, so i said nothing and my friend continued to the previously planned destination: my street where i was dropped off. once inside my house i felt my conscience tugging me toward the garage to get my bike so that i could bring cricket back home. i rode it in this humid fucking sunny fucking day, all the way to the pink house where i had spotted her. i rang the doorbell and explained (still gasping for air and red in the face) to the boy who answered that i had seen a little weenie dog with a blue collar with bells attached running in their driveway.

the boy went upstairs and came back down carrying cricket. he asked if she was mine and i replied in the affirmative. she wriggled out of the boy's arms to run to me. i was surprised at how soft and clean her fur was and noticed no waxy goo inside her ears like she had before. she'd also lost the extra weight. she used to be a tubby little weener. i thanked the boy for taking good care of her. he commented on what a quiet dog she was

when i got back to my bike i placed cricket on the ground. what did she do then? took off down the street. i chased after her and cornered her, picked her up and tried to hold her with one hand and walk my bike with the other. due to the fact that i am extremely weak and already exhausted, that didn't work out so well. i did my best to keep the wigglely puppy in my lap as i peddled slowly toward my house. how exhausting. passing cars were honking, passengers were pointing at me =/ it was a busy street.

i got home, took off all my clothes, and laid on the tile floor. can you say overheated? haha, miserable.

when my siblings were brought home by the school buses, before i opened the door for them i held up cricket to the window and watched their jaws drop and eyes get crazy wide. then came the screaming and clawing at the door. i chuckled and let them in. they suffocated cricket with hugs as the tears streamed down their faces. overjoyed is an understatement..after things calmed down they proceeded to telephone everyone to tell them of the news. i made everyone happy

i just happened to be at the right place at the right time. i was rewarded with metaphores of me being a hero to my little sisters and their little friends as well as a trip to my favorite messican restuarant, ninfas off jones rd.

there's either a drastic change (and by change i mean improvement) in crickets' behavoir, or she is adjusting to being back home. she is no longer the hyper little cricket sprinting and jumping every which way, pouncing on everyone she sees. she is well behaved for a pup. still playful but not seemingly on an insane amount of tweak. she hasn't peed once inside since she's been here, she somehow knew to paw at the back door. the pink house had other dogs, i'm thinking she learned all the good behaviors of the older dogs while she was away. if this keeps up i don't think i'll mind her at all. anyways, thanks for reading i hope you enjoyed it.

--peace and nugs

[TokinBlue]

that was quite the story jello. awww you were their hero

you did the right thing by getting demon dog, even tho it seems like it has reformed its ways

finally a story that isnt in block paragraph and has punctuation. its sooo nice to be able to comprehend what i am reading(not pointed to you at all, just a LOT of new posts lately have been that way)

[nushaganazad]

yes, very easy on the eyes lol

and u def did the right thing, id cry if my dog ran away....WILSON!!!!

[MrBubbles]

Devil dog turned saint? fuck man lucky for you. id say those people who found it probably got hella pissed at the lil fucker for pissin all over the house so they took her to a dog training shit or somethin. or who knows, maybe in the few days they had it they beat it into doggie submission.

[TheFxckingHero]

hey now. don't make me copyright my name...

[sodomizedjello]

^lol.

Originally Posted by TokinBlue

finally a story that isnt in block paragraph and has punctuation. its sooo nice to be able to comprehend what i am reading(not pointed to you at all, just a LOT of new posts lately have been that way)

thanks! i tred.

[whos_gotherb311]

dude that was an excellent story. Im not a big fan of weener dogs, but all dogs are cool if there just chill. I used to have a dog named cricket, she was a pug. She was the coolest little black pug, but got run over. Now I have 5 dogs, they are all pretty cool but its too many even though I like them, I cant wait to move out.

[Loki the Wolf]

Haha, why? The next time Cricket shits in your bed, you can't be mad at it. You had it coming!

Damn heroes.

[Ezav420]

Poo between your toes!? Sounds like Cricket is pretty revengeful since he crawls in your bed and shits at your feet.