i'm blazed right now.
and yes, i know the title doesnt make much sense. but its the truth.
So, our hero, Soldier 420, was feelin pretty baked. Upon entering his statement of bakedacity, he had immediately procceeded to the nearest nacho distribution center, the fridge, and begun preparing the holy sacrament. Whilst sprinkiling cheese over the heavenly corn chips, he said "And Zac said there would be cheese; and there was cheese". evidently, on the 8th day, God made nachos.
So after I ate my nachos, and watched some GI Joe PSA's, some time had elapsed. The telephone rang. Soldier 420 rushed headlong into the communications center! he ripped the receiver from its cradle.
"Hello?"
"Ben?"
An explanation is in order at this point. Not only am I not Ben, no one named Ben lives or used to live at my house. I've only ever known 1 ben, and he was a dick. and besides, that was middle school.
"..." (From me)
"Si, no puedo (i dont think he said that, but it was in spanish and i was too stoned to make any sense out of it) (an important thing of note was that he was mumbling it in fragments)"
"This is... there is no... Ben doesnt live here"
"(he made a sad noise here, like a sigh. it hurt my heart)"
At this point, i summon up my experience of one semester of spanish in high school, 4 years ago, to respond do his sadness.
"Lo Siento. el numbre es falso. Adios" (i said this. it doesnt make much sense, but it makes the point, right? any native speakers tell me)
At this point, the guy on the other end, who sounded old, makes an excited noise. Unfortunately, I have more important matters to attend to, so I hang up.
Overall, I am pleased with my performance under pressure. any thoughts?
UPDATE: i just went afk because i was eating spaghetti
whilst i was preparing my glorious meal, I decided to partake in a glass of Wisconsin's Finest. however, as soon as the cap was lifted, my spidey sense tingled. something was wrong here...
with the reflexes of a trained professional, i carefully slid the carton up to my nose. eyes narrowed, i took a sniff. BLECH! that shit was sour as hell! upturning it in the sink, i whispered "i shall fear no milk, for i walk in the valley of sourness, and i am the baddest motherfucker in this valley".
then i went and ate spaghetti. the only comment i had was that the sauce tasted sharp. idk how else to explain it. it just tasted sharp.
goonight errybody

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