james bond aint got nuttin o' me!

[zalzal010]

I am sitting on my computer in my room after one of the most exhillerating things to ever happen in my life. It's a mix of THC and a natural high, its sooo fucking insane.

PLEASE NOTE: The story is kind of long, but it deserves to be known of. Please read on...

Basically, I snuck out to go smoke some joints with my friends (when I wasn't supposed to. And, so you don't accuse me of being under-age, I have this to say to you: I AM in fact 18 years of age, but I am on an agreement with my parents that they'll continue to support my lazy ass through school, as long as I follow their rules). One of them needed a ride home too, so it was a justified trip. I came back, blazed as fuck, and parked on the street. As I approached the house, I could see the light was on in my mom's room and in the living room, so I figured I was fucked. If I opened the door and she saw me, I'd have to have a damn good explaination. To make matters worse, the key mechanism is is loud, so there's no chance of sneaking in quietly. BUT WAIT! I just remember that I left the dead-bolt UNLOCKED, so all one has to do is lightly turn the knob, and the door will swing free, on well-oiled hinges. I pushed the door open slowly, keeping both eyes on my mom who was at the table writing a letter or something. I crept forward enough to clear the door, then slowly set it shut. I then started walking all james-bond like (which is fucked up, because im a really tall fat guy) towards the stairway. I stood right around the corner from the stairway, just out of sight of my mom. I am now like 18 feet into my house, and no one know's that I'm there except the dog. As I turn for the stairway, I hear my dad come out of his room, so I slide back around the corner, in the narrow area of my entryway where niether of my parents can see me. My dad stomps around the upstairs area a bit, then goes back into his room and shuts the door. I make for the stairs, and am nearly at the top when the dog start's frantically wagging it's tail, while simultaneously laying on the floor, which creates a loud thumping noise. I quickly pet the dog to calm it down, then begin traversing the short hallway with the squeaky floors. I made it all the way into my room, and sat down with a smile of victory on my face. I was so sneaky, they should make a movie about that one event.

My mom came up while I was writing this too, but by then I had a good excuse in mind. Something about a girlfriend (that I don't have, what a sly son-of-a-bitch I am) being sad and needing my company. It was so brilliant.

[cube*]

Originally Posted by zalzal010

I crept forward enough to clear the door, then slowly set it shut. I then started walking all james-bond like (which is fucked up, because im a really tall fat guy) towards the stairway...

Hahaha this is gold man. Funny story man.

[Orion26]

u sneeky bastard

[sirseedymcseed]

nice. all of the younger smokers here who live or have lived with their parents (who don't approve) while they smoked have some kind of story or stories about sneaking back home. we just don't have elaborate ones like this. congratulations.

[geologyrox]

lol, i was very, very drunk one time, and i had to get home. (i was like 16? at the time, so coming home drunk was decidedly against the rules) My ride pulled up outside my house, and I realized that my moms light was still on. me=fucked. so i think, hey, i'll climb through my window, into bed, and i'll be there in the morning when she gets up. my window is a little more than three feet off the ground, and i'm barely 5 feet tall. i'm drunk off my ass. i manage to pry the window open (silently, amazingly enough) and i try to haul myself in. it's not working. my ride is sitting out in the car laughing his ass off, watching me. i finally kickone leg up and in, and kind of roll myself into the room, and fall onto my bed. The next day, my mom comes in, and says 'i didnt even hear you come in last night, thanks for being so quiet, your brother was running a fever, and i stayed up all night with him...' I have never been that stupid again, but i was also never so damned exhilerated to get off scot free =)

[zalzal010]

yes, to get the full effect of the story, just imagine james bond walking down some coridoor, stepping into a shadow every 5 seconds as a mindless armed guard marches by. I was so stoned, I couldn't believe they didn't see me once. Sneaking in seemed like some kind of stupid idea that you see in movies, that could NEVER work in real life.

[sirseedymcseed]

i snuck into work one time. well, it wasn't really sneaking because if anyone saw me it didn't matter. i wasn't trying to hide. i was just being sly and trying to avoid confrontation. i walked in the back door and took all the back hallways. i was blazed silly. giggling like a fool.

[RavenousDespair]

congrats!



nice story