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  #121 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 05:21 AM
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I had a huge crush on a girl and her friend when I was 5. Us 3 were never apart. We went to the same school, same classes, same bus stop, and always hung out after school.
They would always do some twisted things to me though, sometimes tying me up to a basketball poll with jump ropes and throwing things at me, or I remember having a snowy hill next to my house and they would put me on a sled and push me down to make me slide into thorn bushes. (Got a thorn up my nose one time and had to have it plucked out with tweezers by my mother. These are just two examples, they loved to abuse me. I remember going home crying even after one of them shoving a stick in my bike wheel and me skidding my chest on the concrete bleeding profusely.
Well anyway, one of the girls lived next door to me and her family had a huge boat in their garage with a cover on it. Us 3 used to sneak into the boat, turn on the radio (keys were always in it) listen to music and play the board game "sorry".
Well, whenever it came time to say "sorry" to someone and push them off the board, instead they would either kiss me, or I had to kiss them. (They liked to use me as an experiment)
So one day I learned that the court system was going to take me away from my mother the day of my 9th birthday.
The next day, I went to the girls house who lived next door to me, and told her I only had an hour to visit before I had to leave forever. (At that age, I was convinced I would never see her again, as I had no idea where I was going so forever it was)
So she insisted that we play one last game of sorry. This time the boat was gone, so we went into her bathroom, she locked the door, and for some reason she setup the board game in the bathtub with no water. So we start playing, and for some reason I knew something weird was going on, but I really had no idea what.
I remember it came time to say "sorry" but this time she took her shirt off instead of asking for a kiss. She layed her shirt on the board game, and thats when I knew the game was over. We started to kiss, and I was so nervous, she had to take my hand and put it on her breasts. She took her panties off, and started to unbutton my pants. I still had no idea what I was doing. I remember groping her too hardly, lol.
So she puts my hand down in her area, and i start feeling around as we kiss. Now I basically knew what sex was, but didnt completely understand, once she got me hard, and I started to feel around on her, I figured it out! I was so embarrased, but was so glad I knew what to do at that point. So i continue to penetrate her and she kinda winced at first, but I remember it going very smoothly and was astonished how wet and enjoyable it was.
Not really sure how much time went by, but thats when i heard a knock on the bathroom door. Her mom goes "mara? Are you in there?" To which mara scatters her clothes back on, "Sorry" board game pieces all over the place. Her mother growing more impatient tries to open the door to which mara replies "yes mom, were playing sorry".... "OPEN THE DOOR!" her mother yells.
This point im freaking out, finally we get settled and she opens teh door for her mom, her mom comes in and asks "Are you ok?" to mara, mara says "yes of course" and ill never forget this, her mom looks at me with the sternest look and goes "its time for YOU to go home"
So we hugged goodbye, promised we would stay in touch and I proceeded to leave. Just then, i look over and see her cabinet has these really nice glass diamond looking handles (back then i thought they were expensive diamonds), I proceeded to steal one (not realizing it wasnt worth shit) to remember her by, and went home.
Talked to her on the phone twice before learning she moved without me getting a forwarding phone/address.
What a day, Mara are you out there?
Edit: Yes I realize I am one of the youngest, no need to diss.
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Last edited by Anony : 05-04-2008 at 05:26 AM.
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  #122 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 06:58 AM
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I fooled around alot when I was young too, my first oral sex was probly in kindergarden, we didn't know what the fuck we were doing.
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  #123 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 04:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anony View Post
I had a huge crush on a girl and her friend when I was 5. Us 3 were never apart. We went to the same school, same classes, same bus stop, and always hung out after school.
They would always do some twisted things to me though, sometimes tying me up to a basketball poll with jump ropes and throwing things at me, or I remember having a snowy hill next to my house and they would put me on a sled and push me down to make me slide into thorn bushes. (Got a thorn up my nose one time and had to have it plucked out with tweezers by my mother. These are just two examples, they loved to abuse me. I remember going home crying even after one of them shoving a stick in my bike wheel and me skidding my chest on the concrete bleeding profusely.
Well anyway, one of the girls lived next door to me and her family had a huge boat in their garage with a cover on it. Us 3 used to sneak into the boat, turn on the radio (keys were always in it) listen to music and play the board game "sorry".
Well, whenever it came time to say "sorry" to someone and push them off the board, instead they would either kiss me, or I had to kiss them. (They liked to use me as an experiment)
So one day I learned that the court system was going to take me away from my mother the day of my 9th birthday.
The next day, I went to the girls house who lived next door to me, and told her I only had an hour to visit before I had to leave forever. (At that age, I was convinced I would never see her again, as I had no idea where I was going so forever it was)
So she insisted that we play one last game of sorry. This time the boat was gone, so we went into her bathroom, she locked the door, and for some reason she setup the board game in the bathtub with no water. So we start playing, and for some reason I knew something weird was going on, but I really had no idea what.
I remember it came time to say "sorry" but this time she took her shirt off instead of asking for a kiss. She layed her shirt on the board game, and thats when I knew the game was over. We started to kiss, and I was so nervous, she had to take my hand and put it on her breasts. She took her panties off, and started to unbutton my pants. I still had no idea what I was doing. I remember groping her too hardly, lol.
So she puts my hand down in her area, and i start feeling around as we kiss. Now I basically knew what sex was, but didnt completely understand, once she got me hard, and I started to feel around on her, I figured it out! I was so embarrased, but was so glad I knew what to do at that point. So i continue to penetrate her and she kinda winced at first, but I remember it going very smoothly and was astonished how wet and enjoyable it was.
Not really sure how much time went by, but thats when i heard a knock on the bathroom door. Her mom goes "mara? Are you in there?" To which mara scatters her clothes back on, "Sorry" board game pieces all over the place. Her mother growing more impatient tries to open the door to which mara replies "yes mom, were playing sorry".... "OPEN THE DOOR!" her mother yells.
This point im freaking out, finally we get settled and she opens teh door for her mom, her mom comes in and asks "Are you ok?" to mara, mara says "yes of course" and ill never forget this, her mom looks at me with the sternest look and goes "its time for YOU to go home"
So we hugged goodbye, promised we would stay in touch and I proceeded to leave. Just then, i look over and see her cabinet has these really nice glass diamond looking handles (back then i thought they were expensive diamonds), I proceeded to steal one (not realizing it wasnt worth shit) to remember her by, and went home.
Talked to her on the phone twice before learning she moved without me getting a forwarding phone/address.
What a day, Mara are you out there?
Edit: Yes I realize I am one of the youngest, no need to diss.
Bro, that's fucking molest, not "sex"... 9 year olds don't have sex.

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Originally Posted by bigred420 View Post
I fooled around alot when I was young too, my first oral sex was probly in kindergarden, we didn't know what the fuck we were doing.
That too.
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  #124 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 05:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anony View Post
I had a huge crush on a girl and her friend when I was 5. Us 3 were never apart. We went to the same school, same classes, same bus stop, and always hung out after school.
They would always do some twisted things to me though, sometimes tying me up to a basketball poll with jump ropes and throwing things at me, or I remember having a snowy hill next to my house and they would put me on a sled and push me down to make me slide into thorn bushes. (Got a thorn up my nose one time and had to have it plucked out with tweezers by my mother. These are just two examples, they loved to abuse me. I remember going home crying even after one of them shoving a stick in my bike wheel and me skidding my chest on the concrete bleeding profusely.
Well anyway, one of the girls lived next door to me and her family had a huge boat in their garage with a cover on it. Us 3 used to sneak into the boat, turn on the radio (keys were always in it) listen to music and play the board game "sorry".
Well, whenever it came time to say "sorry" to someone and push them off the board, instead they would either kiss me, or I had to kiss them. (They liked to use me as an experiment)
So one day I learned that the court system was going to take me away from my mother the day of my 9th birthday.
The next day, I went to the girls house who lived next door to me, and told her I only had an hour to visit before I had to leave forever. (At that age, I was convinced I would never see her again, as I had no idea where I was going so forever it was)
So she insisted that we play one last game of sorry. This time the boat was gone, so we went into her bathroom, she locked the door, and for some reason she setup the board game in the bathtub with no water. So we start playing, and for some reason I knew something weird was going on, but I really had no idea what.
I remember it came time to say "sorry" but this time she took her shirt off instead of asking for a kiss. She layed her shirt on the board game, and thats when I knew the game was over. We started to kiss, and I was so nervous, she had to take my hand and put it on her breasts. She took her panties off, and started to unbutton my pants. I still had no idea what I was doing. I remember groping her too hardly, lol.
So she puts my hand down in her area, and i start feeling around as we kiss. Now I basically knew what sex was, but didnt completely understand, once she got me hard, and I started to feel around on her, I figured it out! I was so embarrased, but was so glad I knew what to do at that point. So i continue to penetrate her and she kinda winced at first, but I remember it going very smoothly and was astonished how wet and enjoyable it was.
Not really sure how much time went by, but thats when i heard a knock on the bathroom door. Her mom goes "mara? Are you in there?" To which mara scatters her clothes back on, "Sorry" board game pieces all over the place. Her mother growing more impatient tries to open the door to which mara replies "yes mom, were playing sorry".... "OPEN THE DOOR!" her mother yells.
This point im freaking out, finally we get settled and she opens teh door for her mom, her mom comes in and asks "Are you ok?" to mara, mara says "yes of course" and ill never forget this, her mom looks at me with the sternest look and goes "its time for YOU to go home"
So we hugged goodbye, promised we would stay in touch and I proceeded to leave. Just then, i look over and see her cabinet has these really nice glass diamond looking handles (back then i thought they were expensive diamonds), I proceeded to steal one (not realizing it wasnt worth shit) to remember her by, and went home.
Talked to her on the phone twice before learning she moved without me getting a forwarding phone/address.
What a day, Mara are you out there?
Edit: Yes I realize I am one of the youngest, no need to diss.
thats just wrong, anyways my story is short and sweet, 7th grade the girl who lived up the street from me (who always liked me) called my over to "chill" we sit down and start watching TV, then she put her arm around me, we start making out, she goes down on me, then after about 5 minutes of that we began to fuck... after that our friendship was never really the same.
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  #125 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 05:15 PM
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Haha nah, it wasnt as bad as maybe I told it, or it reads.
You cant molest the willing and who enjoy it, not to mention she was a virgin also.
Hell we taught each other how to kiss, lol.
Edit: Im proly leaving out a lot of cute details as it was so long ago.
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  #126 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 07:01 PM
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Mine was very embarassing and I am admittedly ashamed of it. I was 15 and was up the Town Centre at this popular chillspot called the courts. I'd go up there to get drunk and pull chicks, and one day I got SO drunk I could barely walk. This girl, who wasn't particularly attractive but had a nice body, picked up on me and I ended upfingering her in front of like 20 people, but that was topped off by some girl being licked out by another girl a few yards away so no one was bothered. Anyway, after some compliments about my 'finger techniques' this girl marched me away towards some public toilets in between Beatties and M&S, where we fucked. I was so drunk it took me ages to get it up, but she gave me head and finally the major stood to attention. I was shagging her on the floor of a cubicle which was dirty, then I banged my head really hard against the door because I was so wasted, so we moved out into the open. Bearing in mind it was about 7pm and the shopping centre was closed, no one was around, but this old man walked in and started watching. I was so drunk I wasn't sure if I was hallucinating but she, in a similarly drunk state, pointed him out and we kind of stood up still having sex, then I carried her back into the cubile with her legs wrapped around my waist, then shut the door, finishing her off up against the wall. It was really crazy drunken sex, with her squirting on the floor and me emptying my load, at least I used a johnny, she carried one round in her handbag.
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lol i wana come to the UK so bad
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Yeah that'd be dope, we gotta hook up and get baked
Cass says:
i duno if i should drive or fly out there
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how could you drive to england?
J. Mac says:
Have you got a car that walks on water?
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Dude, that's probably the most stoned thing I've ever heard you say

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  #127 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 07:52 PM
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mo·lest (m-lst)
tr.v. mo·lest·ed, mo·lest·ing, mo·lests 1. To disturb, interfere with, or annoy.
2. To subject to unwanted or improper sexual activity.

we both consented, there for no molest.
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  #128 (permalink)  
Old 05-04-2008, 08:06 PM
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I was 16. Went to a friends 21st bday party at a house like 45 minutes away, drove my car and had a female friend and a male friend with me, both were 17 at the time, I think? Anyway, I'd been diggin' this male friend for a while, so I got drunk and used my lack of inhibition to my advantage by flirting with this guy in a very obvious way.
Somehow we end up on the side yard in the front of the house making out in some bushes, after a few minutes of that we made our way to my car which was parked outside amongst tons of other cars in this neighborhood (it was a pretty big party). And yeah, then that sex thing happened. In the backseat of my old accord. Not exactly the most comfortable place for your first time, but it worked out.

After we tidied up and went back into the party, the dude who's birthday it was walks up to me and says "Hey, so-and-so said there's some people out there fucking in a car!" and he laughs, and I'm like "".


I did the deed with that guy one more time after that.

Also in the backseat of my car, except we were driving around and pulled over on the side of a back road that I thought wouldn't have much traffic.

I was oh-so wrong though.

Literally mid-fucking, the guy I'm with looks out the back window and says "I think a car just pulled up behind us..." and we both kind of freeze for a second, and then he says "Oh, actually, I think a cop just pulled up behind us."
So we both scramble to put on our clothes, but by the time the cop knocks on the window, I'm just holding my shirt in front of me trying to cover up all the parts I'd rather a cop not see.
So the cop takes our IDs and goes back to his car for a couple minutes.
He comes back, hands us our IDs back and says (I'll never fucking forget this line) "Now put your clothes on and get on your way, you're scaring the nice people on their way to church."


Honestly, that dude I lost it to is kind of a douche now. Not the kind of guy I'd recommend any girl ever date, really.
But I don't regret any of it.
Fun was had, memories were made, such and such and such. Personally, I'm glad I lost mine casually to a friend and not to a 'first love' who just ends up crushing your soul in the end.
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Old 05-04-2008, 08:29 PM
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It was freshman year at college, I was 18. Freshman year, everyone's a stranger pretty much, so you make friends with a wide group of people. One of the girls in my dorm was in a few of my classes, so we'd be hanging out in the dorm studying together or just hanging out at parties.

One night, a lot of people were at home for the weekend. I was just about to head down to the beach (it's right across the street) and smoke a bowl. This girl catches me right as I'm walking downstairs and asks to come with me. She smoked sometimes, but hardly as much as my friends and me.

So we're sitting on this rocky overhang that's overlooking the ocean. The tide is really high at this time of night. The waves are crashing against the rock and kind of licking up at our feet. I forget who did it, but one of us put the lighter down on the ground where we were sitting. Suddenly, a huge wave crashes and we had to jump to our feet to avoid getting our pants soaked. Anyway, the water literally washed away the lighter. It was actually pretty funny.

We went back to the dorm, ostensibly to get a new lighter, but we went into my room and I noticed her taking off her shoes and sitting on my bed, so I just went over and she made the first move. I was a virgin, but she had been around the block. Great experience, especially for the first time. She's got a steady boyfriend these days, but when I see her around campus there's a smile we both give each other. Brightens up even the worst day.
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Old 05-04-2008, 08:34 PM
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when i was sixteen me and my girl would fool around alot and one day after school we got stoned, went to my house, no one was there, and did the "deed" off and on for about 3 hours
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Old 05-04-2008, 10:26 PM
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oh god half these stories are disgusting, kids having sex when they're 11-13? thats just wrong... the thought of a kid who just hit puberty having sex disgusts me
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Old 05-04-2008, 11:25 PM
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i was 17 and unfortunately sober, it was the first time i took this older chick out to a movie or some shit. i dropped her off at her place and she went up to the door and then called me and gave me some line about being locked out so she would just crash on my couch or something. we went back to my apartment. she didn't crash on the couch. fucked every day for a month or two, then she got a real boyfriend. cool story, huh?
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  #133 (permalink)  
Old 05-05-2008, 12:48 AM
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haha some of these are funny as hell. Finger poop on sheets was best.
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Old 05-05-2008, 06:51 PM
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Damn that shit story is some Tucker Max stuff.
I was thinking the same thing, that story was so similar to tuckers
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Old 05-05-2008, 07:24 PM
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That story about the finger shit is one of the funniest things I've ever heard. It reminds me of the story of how this guy at school lost his virginity.

He and his girlfriend were going out for about 3 months, he hadn't had sex before and respectably wanted to save it for that special someone. One day they decided the time was right, so he slipped on his johnny and preoceeded to penerate her. He obviously didn't know what he was doing but he was giving her a good banging and she suddenly whispered 'lets go doggystyle.' She probably meant doggystyle as a position, but he mistook it for anal sex and rammed his cock up her ass before she could protest. Now I don't know if you've ever stook a tissue too far up your ass, but it makes you want to shit. I can't imagine what it was like for this poor lass to have a cock rammed up her butt, but I imagine it made her a little loose, because she proceeded to shit all over her bed, completely ruining the sheets. Naturally the guy was scarred for life and they couldn't reconcile their differences so they split up. What's even worse was that when the girls parents came home and asked her why there was shit all over the bed, she blamed it on the dog. Maybe her parents were overeacting, but they had the dog put down. Everyone at school found out about it because he was stupid enough to tell people, but luckily his girlfriend didn't go to my school because she would have been bullied for the rest of her school days. Needless to say, the lad was called many names ranging from 'Captain Brown Wings' to 'Mr Shitcock.' Needless to say, he's learned his lesson and hasn't had anal since.
__________________
Cass says:
lol i wana come to the UK so bad
J. Mac says:
Yeah that'd be dope, we gotta hook up and get baked
Cass says:
i duno if i should drive or fly out there
J. Mac says:
how could you drive to england?
J. Mac says:
Have you got a car that walks on water?
Cass says:
Dude, that's probably the most stoned thing I've ever heard you say

The Rolling Paper Review Thread



Last edited by Appocolyptik : 05-05-2008 at 07:36 PM.
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