Funny Convenience Store Stoner Story

[Foop]

This was witnessed by me when I went to the store to get some refreshing drinks after a day in the yard.

I walk in and the place is pretty busy, it's around 2 pm on a Sunday. Nice little line forming at the counter. 2 pretty girls are standing at the counter and every single other person in the store is of the male sex except for one other person. And low and behold, there is not a single pair of eyes in the room not fixated on these two girls firm and athletic asses. I laugh this off and go to the beverage cooler. Walk past the icky sodas and energy drinks till I get to the plain old Poland Spring water. I snag a thirst quencher bottle and head back up to the counter.

There are 3 guys standing at the counter getting waited on, an older gentleman behind them getting stuff for a BBQ and then a mid 20's woman behind him buying shit loads of junk food. I slide in to line behind the over sized woman and let my ears take ahold of a pretty hilarious conversation. Ill try to post it as close to verbatim as I can.

Young guy 1: Fuck dude, what kind of dutches do you want?

Young guy 2: Does it look like I give a fuck? I just need to get fucking lit the hell up today man.

Young guy 1: Can I have a pineapple and a grape dutch, a pack of zig zags 1 3/4's, a pack of some Kool shorts, two of those hostess snowballs behind your head, 3 of those large bics, I dont give a fuck as to which color, and some of them.... ah what the fuck are those things.... ahhh... a fucking... a fucking... fuck...fucking one of them Cracker Jacks.

The cashier rings him up and gives him the price. Young guy one reaches in to his pocket to retrieve his money. He pulls out a $20 and with it comes a decent sized bag of what looked to be some decent sized nugs of some beasters. The bag falls to the floor and lays there for all eyes to see. The 3 guys start cracking the fuck up. Howling like a bunch of fucking monkies. Young guy 3 picks up the bag and starts dancing around with it swinging the bag over his head. He proceeds to do this until he dances his way outside, stands stock still and takes a gigantic wiff of the now open bag. He lets out a giant AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! noise. The conversation then turns back to Young guys 1&2 and the cashier.

Cashier: Dont worry about it man, happens all the time.
Young guy 1: Yeah man, I was here last night and dropped a quarter of some nice dro right next to the Chef Boyardee.
Young guy 2: Stupid fuck

Young guy 1 gathers up his food and walks outside and stand nexts to young guy 3. Young guys 2 steps up to the cashier and asks for a pack of smokes and takes his sweet time taking out the money. Guy one comes back in and says to Young guy 2...

"What the fuck are you doing man? We need to get fucking high as kites, leave the fucking smokes, you can have some of mine. Just hurry the fuck up you slow monkey."

The young guys are now all standing outside laughing their asses off and making smoking gestures at passerbys. The old man with the BBQ stuff gets ringed up and proceeds to walk outside. Young guy 3 has now taken a discarded newspaper and rolled it up into something that resembles a gigantic joint. He stuffs it in his mouth and asks the Old man if he has a lighter big enough to spark this "motherfucker" up.

As I pay for my purchase and start to walk outside, I get asked by the 3 guys if I will be partaking in the days festivities. I whip out my King sized Zig Zags and tap them on my head. The 3 young men start jumping up and down cheering as I get in my truck and drive off.

[hoodie]

Dude that's fucking priceless. The security tape must be hilarious!

[theVirtuoso]

haha thats hilarious man.

Very well written story, too.


edit:
btw, theres yours first light green bar

[DahuiRasta]

seems like times im in our local store usually a line and usually first 2-4 ppl im usually 5th all getting wraps and blunts!