Rap battle anyone?

[clipse]

Ayo alice, please go back to wonderland
i dont really mean to diss you and i hope that you will understand
but cat your wack rap is givin me a heart attack
you can't rip on the mic without the skills you lack
and whenever i smoke blunts, im always the one that rolls
i like cash in my pocket but i keep it out my bowls
i dont want to have to stomp you pussy ass weasles
cause me and my dude picked up an 8th of diesel
and shit is lemon fresh its got me stoned off my ass
but still fresh enough to kick a freestyle and relax...

[kevdoggystyle]

if you wanna battle
ill make yo head rattle
and leave you without a paddle
while im learnin how to saddle
your mom.
Pt 2.-
if you think that your the best
then you should retake the test
cause i got A's in the mail
and all you did was fail
so imma have to pay your bail
since youll be in jail
and yo mommas broke
and your friends still choke
when they smoke the green
yadadamean?
3-
your still a rookie
think its cool to play hookie
just go become a bookie
and ill be bringin in some nookie
grow upchuck
and i dont mean vommit
gimme a target and imma bomb it


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you need some more cocoa butter
to wipe on your head
i dont know what goes on in there
you might awready be dead!
cuz you donno how to grow
and you roll reallllly slow
hah tryin to dis your only bro
for dolla yo ass will blow!
like the big bad wolf
tryin to get some sausage.
are you even black
cause you dont got a 6pack
mabey of some smirnoff
bitch you got better grammer than webbster
you shoot a free throw like shaq
your getto game is whack
and hey fool i am a cloud
and you are not at my level
my truck is gettin loud
your still dancin with tha devil
your only check is wellfare and child support
while i cash my paycheck and light up a newport
jk ciggs are bad and so is the pope
down with dope, N up with hope
SIKE

im white to the bone
got a bad bitch on tha phone
your momas on the other line screamin come home!
im uncomfortable sittin on this throne
jus blew 2 bleezies to the dome
and hey ya guess what
its exactly what you got
you might of forgot
that you dont smoke pot
and i hold a lot
make your brain rot
my rhymes are sooper dooper
you carry a pooper scooper
cause your rhymes are shit
leave a taste in ma moth make me wanna spit
like your girl and yo momma
im osama and imma bomma
when you feel like hustlin
gimme a call
cause i run track
and can find the 8ball
i got a motor
yo ass got a bike
my ass needs a mic.
your girl is a dike?
keep watchin "like mike"
i hate when you say mac
cause i never know if its the one with n'cheese on the pack
or the big one that comes with fries and a drink
you need a bowflex
lookin like a burnt up trex
without the teeth and claws
your just to damn soft
went on a diet but i see your off
your moms callin bye "cough cough"

get some new rhymes
cause youve commited some crimes.
you said the same shit in our battle
your like a baby with a rattle.
i hope you realize
that your rhymes are real lies.
you need to recognize that i got you beat
deja vu? exactly, this shit is a repeat
so go ahead and plead defeat
get on your knees, off of your feet.
and do what you do best
you failed your first test
cause you got caught for piracy
a battle between you and me?
we know what the outcome will be.
im gonna put it plain and simple
your set is fake
you might be baked
go ask god to forsake
because imma earthquake
your just a mistake
im munchin on some pancakes
while your writing down my lines
i know your fate
i finish my plate
and wipe my face
your a disgrace
please stop rappin
cause im tired of trappin
you in your lies
tummy full of pies
and a heart full of tries
you need a better disguise
if you dont wanna get caught
for stealin my plot
your rhymes will rot

charles stop stealing my words
yuor being a pretender
get real
be you

it took you an hour to reply
now im gonna make you cry
lay in some grease your bout to fry
your frontin like your hard
but you still got your v-card
and your rhymes are from a retard
gonna call me queer
you take it in the rears
after a couble beers
from one of your peers
somethins in your eye, i think its a tear
you need to realize im your biggest fear
sorry but your still not real
cause your still tryin to steal
first you need to learn how to deal.
cause nickle and dimes is chump change
your house is a dump make it go bang bang.
hah you about to fall
to your knees
cause i am a wall
pay your fees
dont try to ball
pretty please
ill leave tracks on your face
cause im running you over
im winning the race
you need a 4 leaf clover
i set the pace
you follow like rover
just like a dog
you still lost in that fog?
cause your not catchin up
im ready to dine
your like a little pup
and i am a k9
i leave you behind
eating my dust
blame it on rust
im a vetren dont try to bust
bye bye
dont try and fly
cause noone will sigh
your goin to jail
cause you committed suicide
and you owe me for the ride
leave with some pride
im not on your side
atleast you tried?

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

Originally Posted by TokingToker

dog, you don't want beef it's bad for your cholesterol
Your a bitch like a christmas tree, I come up and hang my balls.
Now bitch, your watching me stomp you, look what 5 bucks at the dollar tree got you
I don't smoke alone, But I talk to your mom at night over the phone.
Your raps mature, bitch don't make me roll on floor
Potheads see all the real, cause I'm coming for the steal
My fists will swarm, you'll think its a fucking thunderstorm
n!ga in the hype
todays the first day of the rest of your life as a regular joe, with a regular flow
So I'll take a big mac no pickles
and a regular coke.

+ rep.

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

Yo Ruse don't read shit that
bitch MCs spit, you might as well quit
if you ain't legit
rep GC with the shirt on my back
don't fuck with yay and I don't smoke no crack
but as a matter of fact
I'm an addict
used to have 14 Neville's growin' in the attic
my blazing, dude it's anything but sporatic
I got drug tests, I make sure I get my practice
back on topic, what was it?
I don't know, I forgot it
well fuck it, let the rhymes pile up
like tears in a bucket
if it was a crime to rhyme I'd be doin made time
because I learned from Sage, Immortal, and Sublime
if it wasn't legit to spit you'd get community service
I got rhymes so pricey I buy rap insurance
what time is it?
can't tell
I've been rappin' a spell
ain't got no records to sell
and I'm tired as hell
bitch you take the mic
and let me hit this L

[TokingToker]

Some of you guys are pretty good, dead, ruse, clipse

As for the battle with me and back, idk who wins so like he said someone else should pick.

Anyone else want to pull me out, give me your beat.

Alice..

Look at this guy making 3 stories of crap
somebody give this guy a hard wakeup slap
oh no wait! somebody take that back!
Chop his fucking head off put it in your house
for a memory of a fucking retard
this guy makes 50 cent look like a hero
ill put a whole entire bet of zero
On this white rapping robert de niro.


PS everyone knows a rap battle is a minute
So what were you thinking with those extra 40 minutes

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

well see toker, you gotta know your role
like how I know my rolls
like a pimp knows his hoes
let me pop a red rose
or maybe two green rockers
if I found out about 'em sooner
I woulda had 'em in my locker
they can help you with your flow man
to be honest, you could use it
but I gotta let you know man,
don't abuse it
if it's pricey don't lose it
on second thought maybe you better stick to trees
because you're still learning how to tell the sticks from the seeds
and you've never had a wicked rip of that icky sticky
so no rolls for you, and hell no, no LSD

[backfromthedead]

my style is wicked
wouldn't surprise me if you don't catch it
and I'll bet shit
you can't kick it
like I can
I am the man

[TokingToker]

Originally Posted by RuseOfMetacarpi

well see toker, you gotta know your role
like how I know my rolls
like a pimp knows his hoes
let me pop a red rose
or maybe two green rockers
if I found out about 'em sooner
I woulda had 'em in my locker
they can help you with your flow man
to be honest, you could use it
but I gotta let you know man,
don't abuse it
if it's pricey don't lose it
on second thought maybe you better stick to trees
because you're still learning how to tell the sticks from the seeds
and you've never had a wicked rip of that icky sticky
so no rolls for you, and hell no, no LSD

Make fun of my flow
Your a no show, no go
You couldnt smoke my weed
Do it, you wouldnt be able to breath
You talk' about LSD
When you couldnt even take a puff off my weed
Who the fuck still has a locker
An adult probably gonna drop out
Cause he got held back' smoking too much crack

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

toker thinks he's nice like a pepperoni hot pocket
but he's cold as ice like some bling in a gold locket
couldn't afford it though,
spent too much on shwag he calls dro
15 an 1/8
and he's still broke as shit
tries to rap every day but he still can't spit
hollas at girls he won't ever hit
don't blame the dude though, he tried
to be street but he couldn't decide
which set of fake ass rims to put on his ride
saw him at wal mart holdin' up the line
'til he turned around like "yo, spot me a dime?"
you're broke as joke Mr. Tokity-toker
I'll put it simple terms, ever heard of poker?
well I'm a royal flush and you're a torn up joker
sittin' on facebook like "yo I should poke her..."
alright I'll ease up, go easy
because I've seen you spit nice when you hit the bleezy
but when you're straight your rap game is lame
meanwhile I'm blowin' up like a derailed freight train
so let me refrain and keep the rhyme game goin'
you can spit again but this time make sure you're flowin'

[Thenowhereman42]

Y'all cats in here is straight rappin like queers
I be the overseer and i'm here to burst your ears
And when I'm done I'm sure you'll know who the best M.C. is.
The government think that I'm a muthafuckin terrorist
Because I drop bombs and I'm funded by cannabis.
Y'all can't battle this, and if you try the last thing you'll see's a fist
My rhymes is straight spiritual, I'll make your soul rise above the plane thats physical.
You see me comin and you'll now that I'm imperical.
I'm like a warloard I'll instill fear in your whole fucking crew.
Whats wrong with you? They asked me and I knew.
You head got beat down in my bar with a pool cue.
My rhymes is beautiful, I flow like a raging river
Every time I pull rhymes out of my quiver, they always hit their mark.
I'm like a fuckin flame all I needs a fuckin spark, to pop off,
I'm like tom brokov, bringin you the news
I'll eat your whack rhymes, chew em up, and then spew.

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

Originally Posted by Thenowhereman42

Y'all cats in here is straight rappin like queers
I be the overseer and i'm here to burst your ears
And when I'm done I'm sure you'll know who the best M.C. is.
The government think that I'm a muthafuckin terrorist
Because I drop bombs and I'm funded by cannabis.
Y'all can't battle this, and if you try the last thing you'll see's a fist
My rhymes is straight spiritual, I'll make your soul rise above the plane thats physical.
You see me comin and you'll now that I'm imperical.
I'm like a warloard I'll instill fear in your whole fucking crew.
Whats wrong with you? They asked me and I knew.
You head got beat down in my bar with a pool cue.
My rhymes is beautiful, I flow like a raging river
Every time I pull rhymes out of my quiver, they always hit their mark.
I'm like a fuckin flame all I needs a fuckin spark, to pop off,
I'm like tom brokov, bringin you the news
I'll eat your whack rhymes, chew em up, and then spew.

well if you came here to bust open my ears
then mission accomplished, objective cleared
because your rhymes are nice-
about as nice as the holocaust
when I step to the mic
you know you already lost
I can tell you ain't been rappin' a long time
because "spiritual" and "physical" don't fucking rhyme
and all of your flows are in one-half time
because you can't spit fast or you'll fuck up your lines
trying to be deep like the mariana's trench
but if rhymin' was baseball, bitch you can warm up the bench
when nowhere takes the mic it's like "what's that stench?"
just some whack-ass rhymes that he thinks are flowin
finally, somebody named after where their rhymes are goin

[BlakenKayla]

battle me? nah yall needa get off my jock
yall tryna run a marathon b4 u learn to walk
I spit dat real shit while yall half step rhymin
thes dudes cubic zarconium I'ma blood diamond
I'm da nicest on dis site son ar-gue-a-bly
Idk why im givin yall bars i shud charge yall a fee
I'm simply better true i got the right mixture
yall suck my dick here lemme paint you this picture

lol bored as fuck so i had to jump in

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

you think you're bored? because you're boring as hell
tryin' to spit some rhymes but you can't even spell
my psychic senses are tingling, you're a bitch, I can tell
you're about as cool as ling-ling or a torn ass L
Ruse spits fire like a mythical dragon
all other MC's lines are laggin'
if gay was a verb you'd all be faggin'
rhymin' takes skills and that's why I'm braggin'
I just got two triple kills because I'm straight up fraggin
yeah I play halo, but inbetween rounds I make it happen
Ruse can getcha clappin'
if you're a bitch then I'm slappin'
tryin' to steal my action?
I'm fresh like new bong water
never let the song falter
stay on top of the beat
good at that, like your girl
two step with my feet
I'll battle the whole world
with a L in my mouth
and a pen in my hand
write rhymes that send plagues out
through the holy land
you better pray dog,
or have a good plan
because I never fall short
so you better rap as best you can

[Thenowhereman42]

Originally Posted by RuseOfMetacarpi

well if you came here to bust open my ears
then mission accomplished, objective cleared
because your rhymes are nice-
about as nice as the holocaust
when I step to the mic
you know you already lost
I can tell you ain't been rappin' a long time
because "spiritual" and "physical" don't fucking rhyme
and all of your flows are in one-half time
because you can't spit fast or you'll fuck up your lines
trying to be deep like the mariana's trench
but if rhymin' was baseball, bitch you can warm up the bench
when nowhere takes the mic it's like "what's that stench?"
just some whack-ass rhymes that he thinks are flowin
finally, somebody named after where their rhymes are goin

Yeah your fuckin right that I'm about as nice as a holocaust,
A genocide of whack MC's leavin only the boss,
And if theres a genocide of Whack MC's
You better watch out, you stick out like your name was wienstien,
Yeah because my rhymes is just straight mean,
When they stuck me in the bing I was still smoking green.
It looks like you need a vocabulary lesson,
So I'll educate a little before I pull the smith an wesson
Theres these two little words, assonance, alliteration
If your only using rhymes you got no imagination,
I got some questions, does "time" rhyme with "lines"?
What will be your last thought as I cock back the nine?
Why did I grow up to be so asinine?
Why's your raps so fake and mine so divine?
Like Vinnie fucking Paz I steadily shine.

[RuseOfMetacarpi]

Originally Posted by Thenowhereman42

Yeah your fuckin right that I'm about as nice as a holocaust,
A genocide of whack MC's leavin only the boss,
And if theres a genocide of Whack MC's
You better watch out, you stick out like your name was wienstien,
Yeah because my rhymes is just straight mean,
When they stuck me in the bing I was still smoking green.
It looks like you need a vocabulary lesson,
So I'll educate a little before I pull the smith an wesson
Theres these two little words, assonance, alliteration
If your only using rhymes you got no imagination,
I got some questions, does "time" rhyme with "lines"?
What will be your last thought as I cock back the nine?
Why did I grow up to be so asinine?
Why's your raps so fake and mine so divine?
Like Vinnie fucking Paz I steadily shine.

I can assonate and alliterate all damn day
I'm already anticipating, actually, participating
in an all-out armsrace for an armful
of automatic artillery all will find harmful
say my rap's fake
but it's pure like a wedding cake
I don't rap about guns
because I don't own one
don't rap about slingin'
cuz I've had my run
don't rap about bitches
because I respect the ladies
don't rap about yay
because this ain't the 80's
let's go through this one more time
when one word sounds like another that's called a rhyme
L-i-n-e that spells the word line
so, swap the l with a t and the n with an m
t-i-m-e, line rhymes with time
damn, don't make me explain again
Why so much hate dog, I'm just playin'
tried to call me out, dude I'm just sayin'
with rhymeskills like ours we could topple the government
knock the capital down, bury bitch MCs under it
start the rap-rhymin' revolution
where only the strong survive just like evolution
and shitty rhymes are like air pollution
a complete catastrophe, I got the solution