Good Ole' Boy Puter Operators!!

[cowboysaxman]

You know you're a Good Ol'Boy computer operator if.....

Your web page address is www.booger.com.

Most of the e-mail you receive comes from people who want
to borrow your truck.

You're right proud of that Jack Daniels mouse pad that
you keep on your desk.

When your Mac is running a little slow, you try to fix
it by squirtin' it real good with some WD-40.

You can't understand why the spell checker on your word
processing software doesn't recognize the words "col'beer",
"hon", and "frog-strangler".

One thing that bothers you is how hardly anyone who sends
out e-mail has a handle. you get the itch to start a
message with the words, "Hey, good buddy, you got your
ears on?"

You can't figure out why Microsoft doesn't have its own
NASCAR team. I mean, if it's good enough for Cheerios,
Valvoline, and the Cartoon Network, it ought to be good
enough for Bill Gates, right?

Instead of "bytes", you think of it as "horsepower".

You finally decided to buy a computer after the Gun and
Knife Show went online.

When they said they were coming out with new Windows,
you were hoping it would be something you could drive
up to and order a cheeseburger.

Instead of a mouse, you tell everybody your computer
has a possum.

Your favorite screen saver shows a picture of a bunch
of guys in overalls and NRA hats skinning a deer.

When you find out you needed a modem, you went looking
for one at a garage sale.

You have been thrown out of several chat rooms for
cussing and trying to start an online fistfight.

Your keyboard looks a little different than everyone
else's. Instead of an apple, your command button has
an okra on it.

Congratufreakin'lations - you hold the world record
for most number of hits - on the World Wrestling
Federation web page.

The reason your printer is jammed is that you dropped
your tobacco chew spit cup into the paper holder.

Most of the e-mail you send starts with "I'll tell
you what," "This ain't no bull," or "It's got to
where you cain't..."

Some guy asked you about your floppy, so naturally
you decked him.

You're pretty sure computers would work better if
Briggs & Stratton began marketing a model that
cranks up with a pull rope.

You think that every child should be linked up to
the internet for educational purposes. But you with
there was more information about how to dynamite
fish or build your own still.

Your favorite search engine is Yahoo, because you
run around screaming it during football games and
wrestling matches anyway.

The only reason you had your computer equipped with
a CD-ROM was so you could listen to Merle Haggard.

You figure computer science will have peaked when
you can buy a 12-pack of Old Milwaukee online
without leaving your doublewide.

You were suspicious of your Intel chip at first
because you couldn't find the ball joints or any
place to lubricate it.




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