Funny Cop Stories

[Pucknastyy]

About 3 months ago, I had one of the most ridiculous encounters with a law enforcement officer I had ever had previously.

My mindset was this: I had just enjoyed a vaporizer full of high quality keif to myself, and I was driving on the interstate to a friend's house. It was a beautiful day with not a cloud in sight. The cool breeze was circulating through my open windows, I didn't even bother to put my visor down because the warm rays of the sun felt oh so pleasant upon my face, and mister Jimi Hendrix was there keeping me company on my long drive with his clairvoyant lyrics and his godly guitar riffs. I didn't even realize I was going 15 over I was in such a state of bliss.

So I pass a state trooper who has somebody pulled over, so I slow it down a bit, but before i realize it, I'm right back to cruising. I was not too sure how long he had been behind me with his lights on, but when i finally noticed, naturally, I panicked. As I was in the far left lane, I sped up even faster than I was going to get around a semi to pull over as fast as I could. So I swerve in front of one semi, swerve in front of another, and immediately slam on my brakes the second I get a chance to pull off the road.

As I'm sitting there, mind racked with thoughts of incarceration, the trooper aproaches my window. This stereotipical looking cop strokes his moustache and takes off his aviator sunglasses and he begins his civic duty.

"Do you know why I pulled you over?" says the guy.

"Going a little too fast?" I reply.

"Yes, and, when I tried to actually pull you over, you did some kind of crazy maneuver to get onto the side of the road. Now can I have your license, registration, and proof of insurance please?"

Knowing damn good and well that I was still on probation, and all I had was a learner's permit, I decide to be honest with the guy. "Sir, I don't have a license, but I do have a learner's permit" says I as I'm figitting with the appropriate papers in my glove box. So he walks away, and comes back about 5 minutes later.

"Well," says the cop as he sees me jump, for he startled me, "you didn't give me your registration or your proof of insurance."

My heart sank. I'm going to jail. There's narcotics and paraphernalia in my car, I'm high as a kite, and I didn't even give the guy what he asked for. "Oh, really?" was my only response.

"Nope. You gave me your birth certificate... and a power bill."

WTF WAS I THINKING!?!

Unbelievably, however, the cop tells me that he's not one for writing tickets, and decides to let me go with a warning, and didn't even make me show him my real documentations.

So to make a long story short; cop asks me for license, registration, and proof of insurance, and my simple ass gives him a learner's permit, my birth certificate, and a bloody power bill, and somehow by the grace of some divine deity, I escape with nothing but an amazing story.

[EliteZonger]

4 cop cars and a news helicopter were present when i was pulled over at 2 AM. i had commercial vehicle plates on a normal car so they thought i had jacked it, i get put in the backseat cuffed and cops telling me what a dirtbag i am for stealing a car and stealing plates to put on my car. turns out, what i told them was true (who would of thunk it huh?) about having commercial plates registered to my car, IN MY NAME. stupid assholes

[mikeycas]

this one time i was sitten on a park bench with about 5 other people at about 10:30 at night. Im trippen off of about 25-30 robitussin pills an 4-5 bong rips. Im fucking gone. suddenly, we see these reallyyy bright lights pulling into the park an our immediate thought is to hide the remaining bud we have and the obvious thought of, "SSHIITTT". so the cop comes over to me first because I was obviously the most fucked up and asks me "so how you doin skippy? anything you shouldnt have on you I should know about before I pat you down?" an I just responded, "skippy? why we talkin bout peanut butter bro. pat my ass down i got nothing." So he starts saying if i call him bro one more time hes gonna do this and do that. I didnt really here much I was thinking about eating skippy peanut butter sandwiches. So he pats me down an doesnt find anything so I sit back down and he moves on. He ends up giving me a sobriety test because while hes patting everyone else down I for some reason decided to roll around the park... I failed the test and got cuffed and brought in but all charged ended up bein dropped and I walked out of there with nothing but a recommendation to go to the hospital but It turned out to be a pretty crazy night. before the cop encounter i didnt remember much so I was filled in by the people I was with and it was really funny.. hope you liked my story lol i would never talk to a police officer like that if i was straight an not trippen so bad