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04-11-2002, 07:16 PM
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Old School Stoner
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Nor Cal. Star
Posts: 1,699
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Things Dogs HATE about their owners!
Dogs "Pet Peeves"
1. When you walk away in the middle of a perfectly good leg humping. 2. Blaming your farts on me.....NOT funny! 3.Yelling at me for barking, I'm a friggin' DOG you idiot! 4.How you naively believe that the stupid CAT isn't all over EVERYTHING while you're gone! (Have you noticed that your toothbrush tastes a little like cat butt?) 5.Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out!! Exactly who's walk is this anyway? 6. Any "trick" that involves balancing food on my nose.....STOP THAT!! 7.Yelling at me for rubbing my ass on the carpet, why'd you buy carpet? 8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. SORRY, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.....idiot! 9.How you act disgusted when I lick myself, look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous! 10. Dog sweaters, have you noticed...I have FUR! Dumbass! 11. Any grooming that involves bows or ribbons! Now you know why I chew your shit up when your not home! 12.When you pick up the crap piles in the yard. Do you realize how far behind schedule that puts me?? 13. Taking me to the Vet. for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out everytime we go back! 14.The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. ok, you fooled a DOG! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain, you jerk! 15 Invisable fences. Why do you insist on screwing with our minds???? To my knowledge, dogs haven't solved the VISABLE fence yet!
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 Somedays it's just not worth chewing through the straps :smokingO.F.F.F. Sgt of Arms & H.S.S. Life Member |
    
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04-11-2002, 07:39 PM
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poke smot
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: o0o
Posts: 3,189
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Hence i dont have a dog. But that cat thing scares me.
Z
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04-11-2002, 10:15 PM
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Supa Smoker
Join Date: Feb 2002
Posts: 63
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Haha I think if my dog could talk he would say those exact words!
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"Tie your money to your dog if you feel you might lose your way" ~JB |
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04-20-2002, 12:07 AM
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dublin, ireland
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 23
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why do dogs lick their balls
because they can |
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04-20-2002, 06:46 PM
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The Lizzard King
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: I.... Don't know.....
Posts: 404
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HAHAHA... the fart thing is wrong- in my house <i>I get blamed for the dogs farts</i>
__________________
 <---------- me after several pints"Deep into the darkness peering, long i stood there, doubting, fearing" <i>from "The Raven" by Edgar Allen Poe</i> "Tho the brave do not live as long, the cautious do not live at all." "Fuck it, lads. It could all go tits up tomorrow- and then where would I be. I'll tell you fucking where- without a headache and fucking boaring." |
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04-22-2002, 09:48 PM
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Old School Stoner
Join Date: Apr 2002
Posts: 558
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I have a cat, but never having licked his anus I dont know what cat butt tastes like.
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"You can turn your back on a person, but, never turn your back on a drug. Especially when it's waving a razor-sharp hunting knife in your eye." <a href="http://xkronosx.tripod.com">  </a>
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