19 ways to keep sane

[chill out]

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'In.'

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to expresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For sexual favors."

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy."

8. dont use any punctuation

9. As often as possible, skip rater than walk.

10. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

11. specify your drive-through order is "To Go."

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friend you can't attend their party because your not in the mood.

16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, 'Rock Hard.'

17. When the money comes out of the atm scream "I WON!! I WON!!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot screaming, "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, THEIR LOOSE!!"

19. Tell your kids over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

[stoned_soldier]

oh man, that's funny man.. hair dryer... man... i gotta try the zoo part... hahaha, later

[Gri77oN]

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'In.'


I just might do that, actually.