smoking and usage

AmsterdamdreamN · #1 (**permalink**) 03-21-2003, 05:09 AM

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups.

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth,
long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner
enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes or until red.

9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

10. Complain to self because your husband had been eating your ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

11. Rinse conditioner off hair.

12. Shave armpits and legs.

13. Turn off shower.

14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.

15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small
country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

16. Check entire body for zits, tweeze unwanted hairs.

17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

18. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake weiner at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the
size of your wiener and scratch your behind.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Wash your face.

6. Wash your armpits.

7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how
loud they sound in the shower.

9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.

11. Shampoo your hair.

12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

14. Pee.

15. Rinse off and get out of shower.

16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because
curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

17. Admire weiner size in mirror again.

18. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the ' woo-woo' sound again.

20. Throw wet towel on bed.

hippie john · #2 (**permalink**) 03-26-2003, 05:54 PM

Old but true, Old but true

adamBC · #3 (**permalink**) 03-27-2003, 09:56 AM

woo-wooo!!!!

hahah, funniest shit i ever read.

GRiM420 · #4 (**permalink**) 03-29-2003, 09:40 AM

heh heh woo woo man i was fuckin cracking up

Aurora · #5 (**permalink**) 04-01-2003, 01:50 PM

hahaha . . .^_^

daiseyduked · #6 (**permalink**) 04-01-2003, 02:01 PM

hahahaahaa! that was funny. lol. never heard it before. so true lol.

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#1 (permalink) 03-21-2003, 05:09 AM
AmsterdamdreamN Slow MoFo Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: 22 Acacia Avenue Posts: 338	How To Shower. ( For Men & Women ) HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN 1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups. 4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone. 5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. 7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes. 8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes or until red. 9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 10. Complain to self because your husband had been eating your ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 11. Rinse conditioner off hair. 12. Shave armpits and legs. 13. Turn off shower. 14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. 15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 16. Check entire body for zits, tweeze unwanted hairs. 17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 18. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN 1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake weiner at her making the 'woo-woo' sound. 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your behind. 4. Get in the shower. 5. Wash your face. 6. Wash your armpits. 7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. 8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower. 9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 11. Shampoo your hair. 12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 14. Pee. 15. Rinse off and get out of shower. 16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 17. Admire weiner size in mirror again. 18. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the ' woo-woo' sound again. 20. Throw wet towel on bed. __________________ "The world has achieved brilliance without wisdom, power without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants. We know more about war than we know about peace, more about killing than we know about living" - U.S General Omar Bradley, 1948

#2 (permalink) 03-26-2003, 05:54 PM
hippie john Old School Stoner Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Earth Posts: 3,846	Old but true, Old but true __________________ Cheap Grow Supplies \|\|\| Grow Box Design Guide Save a tree, wipe your ass with a spotted owl.

#3 (permalink) 03-27-2003, 09:56 AM
adamBC Old School Stoner Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: BC (bud country) Posts: 3,993	woo-wooo!!!! hahah, funniest shit i ever read. __________________ i've never had a dream in my life, because a dreams something you wanted, but still haven't pursued. i knew what i wanted, and did it till it was done, so i've been living the dream i wanted to be since day ONE.

#4 (permalink) 03-29-2003, 09:40 AM
GRiM420 Pure Evil Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 357	heh heh woo woo man i was fuckin cracking up

#5 (permalink) 04-01-2003, 01:50 PM
Aurora california love Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 308	hahaha . . .^_^

#6 (permalink) 04-01-2003, 02:01 PM
daiseyduked *potpixie* Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Canadian Superstar Stoner Posts: 1,989	hahahaahaa! that was funny. lol. never heard it before. so true lol. __________________ The most beautiful experience we can have is the mystical,it is the power of true art and science - Albert Einstein Peace will come when each of us goes within,and realizes that we are all equal aspects of God;then we can all sit together in harmony - A Spiritual Warrior

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