smoking and usage

al bundy · #1 (**permalink**) 06-20-2007, 05:51 PM

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid-term. Question: How hot is Hell?

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it
with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the
pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs
using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is
compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.
So we need to know the rate at which souls are
moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we
can
safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will never leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
different Religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of
their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we
can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we
look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law
states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the
same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are
added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the
rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure
in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure
will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa,
(Cheerleader, Captain and Class Valedictorian) during my Freshman
year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and
take into account the fact that I slept with her last night and again
this morning, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell
is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has
frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls
and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, and thereby proving
the existence of a divine being, which explains why Teresa kept
shouting "Oh my God!!!"

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

dynasty · #2 (**permalink**) 06-20-2007, 06:38 PM

ahahahahahaha

nice.

TheGreenPot · #3 (**permalink**) 06-20-2007, 10:49 PM

Yeah, that's pretty damn brilliant.

the roach · #4 (**permalink**) 06-21-2007, 04:33 AM

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa,
(Cheerleader, Captain and Class Valedictorian) during my Freshman
year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and
take into account the fact that I slept with her last night and again
this morning, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell
is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has
frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls
and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, and thereby proving
the existence of a divine being, which explains why Teresa kept
shouting "Oh my God!!!"

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"[/quote]

This made my day

Liquidtruth · #5 (**permalink**) 06-21-2007, 07:12 AM

I've read this before and it is very funny. I hope it is a true story and not an urban legend.

Rabiez · #6 (**permalink**) 06-21-2007, 02:40 PM

The last 2 paragraphs of this are slightly different to most.

Usually, the student fails to bed Theresa, and concludes that hell is endothermic.

Anyway:

http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp

Mr.GoodStuff · #7 (**permalink**) 06-21-2007, 04:40 PM

Loved it!

Auris · #8 (**permalink**) 06-27-2007, 06:51 PM

LMFAO

nice shot

kinky19777 · #9 (**permalink**) 07-02-2007, 07:44 PM

Law school bound

Budder81 · #10 (**permalink**) 07-20-2007, 06:55 AM

Even if it isn't true (story), it is very clever.

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#1 (permalink) 06-20-2007, 05:51 PM
al bundy Registered User Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 49	How hot is hell? The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. Question: How hot is Hell? The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will never leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa, (Cheerleader, Captain and Class Valedictorian) during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night and again this morning, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, and thereby proving the existence of a divine being, which explains why Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God!!!" THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"

#2 (permalink) 06-20-2007, 06:38 PM
dynasty ask nothing know nothing Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: The dark side of Mimas. Posts: 887	ahahahahahaha nice. __________________ Tales from the Bowl Friend: Does heroin make you get a lisp? Me: What? Why? Friend: Well like, Anthony Kiedis and John Frusciante both have lisps, and they were pretty big junkies. Me: No, I think it's just the funk.

#3 (permalink) 06-20-2007, 10:49 PM
TheGreenPot Hit that shit! Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Canada Posts: 175	Yeah, that's pretty damn brilliant. __________________

#4 (permalink) 06-21-2007, 04:33 AM
the roach is dead Join Date: May 2007 Location: bumtown Posts: 1,728	If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa, (Cheerleader, Captain and Class Valedictorian) during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night and again this morning, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven, and thereby proving the existence of a divine being, which explains why Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God!!!" THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A"[/quote] This made my day __________________

#5 (permalink) 06-21-2007, 07:12 AM
Liquidtruth Moderator Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Canada Posts: 4,189 Blog Entries: 1	I've read this before and it is very funny. I hope it is a true story and not an urban legend. __________________ Cannabis being illegal is a literal crime against humanity. "It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." - Aristotle "No matter what side of the argument you are on, you always find people on your side that you wish were on the other." - Jascha Heifetz "Your god is dead and only the ignorant weep. And if you claim there is a hell, then we shall meet there!” - Friedrich Nietzsche

#6 (permalink) 06-21-2007, 02:40 PM
Rabiez Ragamuffin Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: UK Posts: 954	The last 2 paragraphs of this are slightly different to most. Usually, the student fails to bed Theresa, and concludes that hell is endothermic. Anyway: http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp __________________

#7 (permalink) 06-21-2007, 04:40 PM
Mr.GoodStuff Behind Your Eyes Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: In a village of hydrohuts Posts: 2,456	Loved it! __________________ Finally harvesting and smoking my own weed again! Mazar & Blueberry Hydro Grow My Brother's River System

#8 (permalink) 06-27-2007, 06:51 PM
Auris Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Posts: 12	LMFAO nice shot

#9 (permalink) 07-02-2007, 07:44 PM
kinky19777 Banned Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 507	Law school bound

#10 (permalink) 07-20-2007, 06:55 AM
Budder81 (\';::;'/) Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: 3rd rock from the sun Posts: 2,016	Even if it isn't true (story), it is very clever. __________________ http://cannaopia.myminicity.com/ < check it out

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