smoking and usage

smokinokie · #1 (**permalink**) 12-04-2002, 04:58 AM

Dear Friends.
I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some goodies for me to leave under your tree at Christmas. I was going to bring you all gifts from the 12 days of Christmas, but we had a little problem. The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come down with VD from fiddling with the 10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping have knocked up the 8 maids a-milking, and the 9 pipers piping have been arrested for doing weird things to the 7 swans a-swimming. The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtle doves and the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my sled runners in bird shit. On top of all this Mrs. Claus is going through menopause, 8 of my reindeer are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some people who can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th of January. Maybe next year I will be able to get my shit together and bring you the things you want! This year I suggest you get your asses down to Walmart before everything is gone.

Sincerely,
Santa Claus

stonie jo · #2 (**permalink**) 12-04-2002, 05:22 AM

Dear Santa,

Get you shit together, man!! It's ONE DAY out of the year! I will accept no whiny ass excuses!! Slip the Mrs. a couple valiums. Give Rudolph the night off and turn on you damned headlights! You can keep all the birds and fiddlers and shit - they would just be tortured and abused by my boys!!
Now - you go get your shit together and I don't want to hear from you 'til you are singin a different song!!

MOM

ReformMaryJaneLaws · #3 (**permalink**) 12-04-2002, 05:53 AM

I was really liking Smokin's letter but I must say that Stonie Jo blew it out of the water! Good one, girl!!!!

Bud Head · #4 (**permalink**) 12-04-2002, 01:41 PM

Good one Stonie Jo!!!

Santa, Chill out man and smoke ya a big one!!!!!!!

Don't load it on the shitter though!

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#1 (permalink) 12-04-2002, 04:58 AM
smokinokie BaldHippeeRedneck Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Bewilderment near the State of Confusion Posts: 1,426	Letter from Santa. Dear Friends. I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some goodies for me to leave under your tree at Christmas. I was going to bring you all gifts from the 12 days of Christmas, but we had a little problem. The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come down with VD from fiddling with the 10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping have knocked up the 8 maids a-milking, and the 9 pipers piping have been arrested for doing weird things to the 7 swans a-swimming. The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtle doves and the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my sled runners in bird shit. On top of all this Mrs. Claus is going through menopause, 8 of my reindeer are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some people who can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th of January. Maybe next year I will be able to get my shit together and bring you the things you want! This year I suggest you get your asses down to Walmart before everything is gone. Sincerely, Santa Claus __________________ There is no darkness, only an absence of light.

#2 (permalink) 12-04-2002, 05:22 AM
stonie jo Old School Stoner Join Date: Oct 2001 Posts: 710	Dear Santa, Get you shit together, man!! It's ONE DAY out of the year! I will accept no whiny ass excuses!! Slip the Mrs. a couple valiums. Give Rudolph the night off and turn on you damned headlights! You can keep all the birds and fiddlers and shit - they would just be tortured and abused by my boys!! Now - you go get your shit together and I don't want to hear from you 'til you are singin a different song!! MOM

#3 (permalink) 12-04-2002, 05:53 AM
ReformMaryJaneLaws RMJL-Forum Administrator Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 17,557	I was really liking Smokin's letter but I must say that Stonie Jo blew it out of the water! Good one, girl!!!! __________________ RMJL GC Rules

#4 (permalink) 12-04-2002, 01:41 PM
Bud Head Old School Stoner Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 10,834	Good one Stonie Jo!!! Santa, Chill out man and smoke ya a big one!!!!!!! Don't load it on the shitter though! __________________ If you can't own a John Deere, just get out of farming..

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