life= not so awesome sometimes
Posted 08-26-2008 at 08:24 PM by andi
i just need to rant a bit, ramble... i'm 18 , since i was 11 or 12 i've had this on and off feeling of being depressed. i don't know why, various reasons. things get better, i don't feel down everyday, but i always seem to get back into this state .... its always lingering there, it never goes away. i feel like i shouldn't feel this way, i should be happy with what i got. i don't feel strong.
i love painting, and art.... its an escape for me..... sometimes, but not all the time..... i push it away, periods of times.... or i don't know ... just as if you would push a person away.
i find myself having random breakdowns, more in the past few months then in a long time.....
its scary in life to not know what you want to do with the rest of it. what you want to be, i want to be alot of things.... but not for my entire life.
i don't want to go to college, i can't afford it. i may take online classes this winter..... but its pointless to me, i feel like we shouldn't have to go to college for the things we want to do, i wish money didn't hold us back on things, we should be free, college should be free.
i want to runaway sometimes, and just... hitchhike. i want to live in a cave.
i love painting, and art.... its an escape for me..... sometimes, but not all the time..... i push it away, periods of times.... or i don't know ... just as if you would push a person away.
i find myself having random breakdowns, more in the past few months then in a long time.....
its scary in life to not know what you want to do with the rest of it. what you want to be, i want to be alot of things.... but not for my entire life.
i don't want to go to college, i can't afford it. i may take online classes this winter..... but its pointless to me, i feel like we shouldn't have to go to college for the things we want to do, i wish money didn't hold us back on things, we should be free, college should be free.
i want to runaway sometimes, and just... hitchhike. i want to live in a cave.
Total Comments 3
Comments
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Hey man there are plenty of things you could do without a college education. I'm sure you would find alot of these things interesting too.
-Glassblowing (you said you like art)
-Starting up a local headshop
-Sell your paintings locally (craigslist/ebay) and see where that takes you.
Dude the list goes on and on. Stop feeling depressed now because your afraid of the future. Take actions now that will serve as stepping stones towards future happiness.
If you ever want to talk about shit just PM me man, I'd love to talkPosted 09-12-2008 at 07:14 AM by SmokeLemenT
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thanks for commenting, and the advice. and just being there. means alot ... :]Posted 09-12-2008 at 07:18 AM by andi - You can get financial aid for college very easily. Sure it stacks up a debt to be paid after you graduate, but you are ready for an awesome job at that point anyway. They have flex payment plans that don't even start until 6 months after you graduate. Don't let "not having money" be an excuse for not getting a college education. I'm broke too but I am still pursuing a degree to start a career I will love. The possibilities are there...don't hold yourself down.
Posted 09-21-2008 at 08:56 PM by Ms.NatureFaerie
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