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Old 05-11-2008, 03:30 AM
city4eva204 is offline  
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city4eva204
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: NY
Posts: 190
its just literature guys, he said hes rational so just read it like you would something written by poe. now if we read about something like this on the news in a week, then id be freaked out. but, poe's work is dark and mysterious, somewhat along the same style of this piece

its pretty well written, it definitely does the job of emotion expressing which i feel is critical to good writing. writing w.o emotion is like sculpture or art w.o emotion, its just not as deep and full of meaning w.o it.

that being said, i see where all the emotion is coming from and i understand how it feels to have your heart ripped up. however, id like to see some more work focused on a different subject, cuz u def have the potential to write some good stuff. the severity of this is wat is creeping ppl out, focus on another aspect of the emotion, draw similes and keep it mysterious and surprising, and try to paint a picture with words rather than just actions.
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