I don't know if you turned this in already but I proofread it and found a couple errors. I saw a few sentences that my professor would call run-ons, and a couple of typos that I'm not sure if you caught before you turned them in. Namely you left the last "e" off a severe and to my knowledge the drug is called Vicodin not vicidin.
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Our police would be able to focus their energy on the real criminals in our nation as opposed to wasting money charging citizens with minor marijuana offenses.
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Seems to me you would want a comma after nation, before as opposed.
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This unintended result of the prohibitive laws against marijuana has caused a slight increase in crime revolved around the purchase of the herb.
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I would rewrite that particular part of the sentence, maybe replace it with "crime related to the purchase of the herb."
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Aside from the straight sale of cigarettes, tobacco companies spent $21.2 million professional lobbying firms in 2003, which amounts to more than $127,000 for every day Congress was in session
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This sentence doesn't sound right, it's missing something.
Other than that I think you hit most of the important points. You could cite studies that have proven youth usage decreases, not increases, in countries that have decriminalized or legalized marijuana. Also, you may want to mention marijuana's benefits among sufferers of Alzheimer's. Good luck and definitely tell us your grade.
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Originally Posted by Zandaman489  Good job man, Im interested to see your grade and whether dko will be right about the teachers bias.
I have to do a similar paper, but we have a topic...the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict...20 pages...I hate my life. |
Oh my God 20 pages would kill me lol. But interestingly enough I just wrote a paper dealing with this to some degree, it was about the 1972 Olympics in Munich and related events afterwards. If it's on-topic enough I'd suggest you read into Black September, the Munich massacre, and Operation Spring of Youth. Most of the info I found was from wikipedia and the top sources listed at wikipedia, namely a site called the jewish library or something to that extent. I'd think since all of the events involved Israelis killing Palestinians or vice-versa it would be suitable.