For those of us who are blessed with single-minded conservative parents who don't condone smoking pot, we have to hide it. I've been caught by my parents twice (and tried to use reason and logic to tell them why I smoke, and why I think its ok for me to smoke cheeba). Both times could have been easily prevented.
I lack organizational skills, so I'm going to jump right into this thread.
Things every stealth smoker should have
- A fan that can be placed in a window to suck air out ($20+)
- A can of UNSCENTED OUST ($2)
- Sploof (Most houses have what you need to make one)
- A pipe that you can cover the top with ($?)
- COMMON SENSE and a LOVE for the cannabis plant
Smoking in the bedroom
My bedroom is the place where I feel the most comfortable. If I'm home alone and want to toke a bowl, my favorite place would probably be on my favorite chair with my feet up and a bowl packed.
A fan is essential if you want to smoke in your room. Place the fan in the window (so the air gets sucked out of the room), and crank it up. Then fire it up. Blow your hits into the fan. If you have a second floor window, you're golden. The wind should carry it away 10x better then if you had a first floor window. If you live on the ground floor, the smoke can tend to linger in colder temperatures.
A Good pipe is one that can be covered
My brother has always had this awesome pipe called a protopipe. They are made by hippies in a commune somewhere in northern California and can be found for about $45.
The city sells them for $53 + Shipping. [
http://shop.grasscity.com/shop/grasscity/misp089.html ].
They come with a built in screen (the disc looking thing on the bottom), a poker, and a small tube that acts as a resin scraper, bowl tamper, AND it can hold a little more then 1/8 ounce of finely ground marijuana. The rubber mouthpiece makes it so you don't taste the metallic taste you usually get from metal pipes.
The best feature about this pipe is the top. It has a swivel bowl cap that you can flick over with your thumb.
A LOT of the smell doesn't come from the smoke that's in the air. It comes from the smell of an open bowl. Same deal with how roaches stink. Burnt weed has a pungent smell, so cover your bowl.
If you dont want a protopipe, you can just use your favorite pipe and put a penny, nickel, or if its a party bowl, a Sacajawea coin on top. I've found that pennies fit most normal sized bowls.
Smoking in the shower
Smoking a bowl in the shower after a long day of work is my favorite thing to do. Its a great, private place, and funny smells can usually be blamed on taking large shits.
Take a towl and roll it up, then place it over the crack under the door. Shut the window, and turn the shower on as hot as it will go. Let the place steam up.
I'm not exactly sure how this works, but I believe the smoke gets absorbed by the water in the air, trapping the smell in the microscopic water bubbles.
Once the room is nice and steamy, you can blow the hits out the window, or you can just blow it right into the stream of water from the shower.
One thing that may eventually give you away is the flicking noise of your bic. Rip off the child safety and use your fingernail to just barely flick it, and its so much quieter.
After you're done, hop in the shower and clean up (showers are exhilarating when you're stoned, plus its sort of like your cleansing your whole body.... Its nice). Use some spray, and open the window. Make sure you watch your time. You can easily spend 30 minutes with the shower running (wasting water) if you get too baked up and zone out.
Smoking in the closet
I share a room with a little kid, and it really helps me sometimes (like when I'm sick) if I toke up before I go to bed. I really want my little bro to make his own decisions about marijuana (but I want him to know the truth when he's old enough to know it), so I try to keep it on the down low.
First of all, like the shower, you should stick a towel or shirt under the door to block the airflow. Obviously, you should shut the door behind you. I'm lucky enough that my closet has a small hatch that opens up and leads to a crawlspace in the attic. I blow my hits into the attic then close the hatch. I doubt many of you have closet hatches, so here's what you need... A sploof!
A sploof is a paper towel roll stuffed with drier sheets. You blow your skunky hits through one end, and they come out smelling like fresh laundry on the other. The more sheets you use, the better the oder-fighting ability. Make sure you change them often. You can get creative with duct tape or electrical tape... Search the city, there's guides somewhere.
Blow your hits into the sploof, and it will smell like fresh laundry. Keep the door closed until its safe for you to air it out . If you do this every night, it will start to smell of cheeba.
Above all else, make sure you can hear if someone's approaching. Most teenagers will develop the skill of knowing what room someone is in just by listening to the footsteps or noises. An easy way to hear things on the other side of a door is to put your ear to the crack under the door.
Blaze on, and don't get caught.